He’s got the whole world in his hands, and that includes London. Bray Wyatt and his Family kicked off Raw in London’s O2 Arena with a sing-a-long, a parable, and, most importantly, a message. A message to John Cena, who accepted “The Man of 1,000 Truths’” challenge for a Last Man Standing Match at WWE Payback and may have unwittingly sealed his own doom in the process: Not only did Wyatt promise to be the Last Man Standing, he promised that Luke Harper would put Cena down in a one-on-one match later in the evening. It took a timely bit of misdirection for Cena to get his own word in edgewise; he used his entrance music to distract the Family and emerged from beneath the ring to fell Bray himself with an Attitude Adjustment. Actions speak louder than words, after all.
Add the U.K. to the list of Paul Heyman’s conquered territories; not only did his client Cesaro knock off U.S. Champion Sheamus, but The King of Swing may have accomplished a feat that’s even more impressive: He got under Sheamus’ skin.
Cesaro wisely retreated to the outside each time Sheamus started to roll, though an early Ten Beats of the Bodhrán left The Swiss Superman stumbling straight into the Irishman’s waiting fists. Cesaro used Sheamus’ own momentum to send him flying through the ropes and then turned the tide, tossing his opponent through the ropes in an evidently successful attempt at demoralization: The enraged champion surged to the advantage and was so dead-set on destruction that a distraction from Heyman left him open to a German suplex pin from Cesaro, who couldn’t even be bothered to take up his foe on a sportsmanlike handshake.
Why should Godzilla have all the fun? Big E and Ryback hopped on the kaiju big battle bandwagon in high style, clashing in a monstrous Beat the Clock Match that all but shook the O2 Arena to its foundation. With an Intercontinental Title Match going to the fastest victor, Big E and “The Big Guy” unleashed the full scope of their considerable arsenals to stake a claim to the gold. After each man let fly with gravity-defying slams and strikes that could level Buckingham Palace, Ryback claimed the advantage by taking out E’s leg from behind. Ryback couldn’t provide enough of a follow-up to dispatch the powerlifting champion, though, and E took one step closer to reclaiming his former title by neutralizing Axel and crushing Ryback with the Big Ending to set the pace at 5:02. Finally, he has five.
It’s good to be Fandango. Sure, you occasionally have to get clobbered across the chest by Sheamus, yet it turns out the greatest battle involving the dancing fiend doesn’t feature him as a competitor, but rather the prize. Fandango has made quite the show of his budding love with Layla ever since tossing Summer Rae to the curb, and the “Total Diva” returned to mark her territory in London, offering Layla some hometown humiliation by planting a big one on ‘Dango before pouncing on the put-upon former Divas Champion and sending the happy couple scurrying.
It would appear Stephanie McMahon might get what she wanted all along. Granted, it took outlandish circumstance to accomplish what Kane, Batista, Triple H and Randy Orton all could not, but with Daniel Bryan on the mend following neck surgery this past Thursday and unable to compete for the foreseeable future, WWE’s principal owner has all the grounds she needs to strip the “Yes!” Man of his WWE World Heavyweight Championship.
However, as she revealed to the WWE Universe in her “State of the WWE World Heavyweight Championship” address, Stephanie knows better than to make Bryan a martyr by doing so. Instead, she officially placed an offer on the table for Bryan to come to Raw next week and surrender his title to her, so that the WWE Universe may have the “active” champion she says they deserve.
Alas, the one-night-only reunion of The Union Jacks had all the longevity of an Oasis reunion, thanks to some anarchy in the U.K. courtesy of the mighty Rusev. With Heath Slater as the chosen 1MB to face The Bulgarian Brute, Rusev’s victory initially seemed all but certain, though the former WWE Tag Team Champion mustered up enough love from his adopted hometown to give the big man a fight. Not enough, though, as The Super Athlete submitted Slater in short order with the Accolade and put a hurtin’ on Drew McIntyre and Jinder Mahal to boot. Oh, darling!
The Whole Dam Show went international thanks to RVD’s Beat the Clock victory over Alberto Del Rio; not only did it give Mr. Monday Night a chance to beat on his on-and-off rival, but it also knocked off Big E’s earlier mark as the time to beat for prospective No. 1 contenders to the Intercontinental Championship. RVD was all over Del Rio from the start, attempting to dispatch him with a series of elaborate roll-ups before The Essence of Excellence found his (educated) footing. The former World Heavyweight Champion – a man who claims to have shouldered no less a burden than the future of the planet – would not be beaten so easily. Despite two Rolling Thunders from RVD, it took a reversion to Van Dam’s original game plan – a roll-up – to claim the win at 4:15.
Nothing like a good loophole to even the odds: With only official personnel allowed at ringside for Seth Rollins’ rematch with Batista, Triple H exploited a technicality by installing himself and Randy Orton as special guest ring announcer and timekeeper for the contest … and Rollins countered by naming Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns as special guest commentators.
A brutish trip into the steel steps grounded Rollins for a long stretch and Batista capitalized, unleashing an elbow that sent the former WWE Tag Team Champion into a full flip. “The Aerialist” quickly took flight after being muscled into his enemies’ corner, forcing Evolution to interfere and kick off an all-out melee between the two factions that ended in a DQ win for Rollins when The Game clobbered him with a forearm. With the match over, The Shield was free to pounce on their foes, though Evolution was able to save face by rescuing Batista from a Triple Powerbomb.
Never let it be said that AJ Lee has a monopoly on jilted Diva meltdowns: Alicia Fox proved herself quite the firecracker last week after a loss to Paige, unleashing a tirade that practically left JBL with PTSD.
The former Divas Champion was under high pressure for the follow-up, and Miss Fox delivered in more ways than one: Not only did she pick up where she left off in manhandling Paige during their rematch, but she made a case for herself as No. 1 contender by actually pinning the champ in her home country. Which isn’t to say the WWE Universe was safe from another mood swing; Alicia went wild in a celebration of joy, dousing herself with soda, accosting WWE official John Cone in a victory hug and absconding with Jerry “The King” Lawler’s crown. At least JBL kept his hat.
Four minutes and fifteen seconds is a little less time than Dolph Ziggler typically takes to do what he does best, but four minutes and fifteen seconds is all he had. Despite the fact that Dolph didn’t quite top Rob Van Dam’s time and become No. 1 contender to Bad News Barrett’s Intercontinental Championship, The Showoff gave an expert class in how to take down a behemoth with his effort against Mark Henry. Unable to compete with the raw power of The World’s Strongest Man, Ziggler picked Henry apart with dropkicks and, when Henry gained momentum, used speed to his advantage by escaping the World’s Strongest Slam and hitting the Zig Zag … though not quick enough to beat RVD’s time.
The newly crowned No. 1 contender wasn’t celebrating for very long, though; he came back through the curtain only to be Bad News’ed back into Eastern Standard Time by Barrett, who promised his hometown faithful that a “bloody Yank” would never take his title from him, thank you very much.
Does party time stop for an interview? Goodness gracious, no. Despite Renee Young’s most pointed efforts to extract something resembling coherence from Adam Rose, the party animal seemed less concerned with giving quotes than rallying his Exotic Express into a party-hearty froth (even Rose’s giant rabbit got in on the fun).
But Zeb Colter, like any codger worth his salt, arrived with Jack Swagger to put a stop to the noise, and that’s when Rose showed his vicious side, dispatching the Real American contingent and restarting the party before Colter even knew what hit him.
With The Usos at his flanks, John Cena managed to defeat Bray Wyatt’s lieutenant Luke Harper … though it certainly cost him. Having tussled many times before, Harper and Cena were forced to dig deep into their respective stores – Harper-canranna! Dropkick! Torture-rack neckbreaker! – throughout the twenty-minute barnburner, though Cena caught the first real break of the match when he entwined Harper’s tree-trunk legs into the STF.
With the fate of the match at stake, The Wyatts rushed the ring and were met in kind by The Usos; Even though Bray Wyatt dispatched both Tag Team Champions with Sister Abigail and Cena wandered straight into a Michinoku Driver from Harper, it was interference from The Wyatts after an AA to Harper that gave the Cenation leader the win.
And what a hollow win it was! The Wyatts immediately circled the Cenation leader and pummeled him up the ring; Bray punctuated the assault with Sister Abigail to the steel stage while Harper counted to ten and the crowd sang along with The Eater of Worlds. When all was said and done, Wyatt ended the night much as he began it: With the whole world – and John Cena’s fate – in his hands.
- Numbers in parentheses indicate the length of the match.
- (c) refers to the champion(s) heading into the match.
- Cesaro (w/ Paul Heyman) defeated Sheamus (12:26)
- Big E defeated Ryback (w/ Curtis Axel) (5:02) in a Beat The Clock Match
- Rusev (w/ Lana) defeated Heath Slater (w/ Drew McIntyre & Jinder Mahal) (0:42)
- Rob Van Dam defeated Alberto Del Rio (4:15) in a Beat The Clock Match
- Seth Rollins defeated Batista by DQ (13:43)
- Alicia Fox defeated Paige (3:30)
- Dolph Ziggler vs. Mark Henry ended in a Time Limit Draw (4:15) in a Beat The Clock Match
- John Cena (w/ Jey Uso & Jimmy Uso) defeated Luke Harper (w/ Bray Wyatt & Erick Rowan) by DQ (12:31)
Other on-screen talent
Bray Wyatt addresses John Cena
Cesaro v Sheamus
Big E. v Ryback
R-Truth & Naomi v Fandango & Layla
Stephanie McMahon Announcement
Rusev v Heath Slater
RVD v Alberto Del Rio
Seth Rollins v Batista
Alicia Fox v Paige
Dolph Ziggler v Mark Henry
Renee Young interviews Adam Rose
John Cena v Luke Harper
|WrestleMania Revenge Tour 2014|
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